Live Life Loud Without Censorship

Look, gay teens. It’s time for me to level with you here: I’ve seen a lot of quiet gays lately. I’m sick of it. I’m sick of other gays thinking that they can’t speak out. They feel closed off from the world. There’s too much gay suicide and yes, even one unnecessary death is one death too damn many.

You’re going to have to stand up for yourselves. Look at Dan Savage — is anybody going to tell him to get back in the closet? Hell no. It doesn’t get more out than Dan Savage. He’s harsh, but he’s often spot on. It’s time for you to grow a backbone, gay teen. We’ve tried to coddle you, nurture you, and cuddle you a little too much. That’s partially our fault but you’re going to have to eventually cut the cord. You can’t just sit there hoping that life is going to get better. Gay teens, you’re going to need to go out and make it better. Stand up to bullies. Call them out.

We have good news for you — the world is changing. More and more Americans alone are deciding that hey, letting gay people marry isn’t a bad thing. Illinois is making same sex marriage legal, and that’s a big step in the right direction. Even though Chicago is pretty liberal in many ways, the rest of the state isn’t. That means that we just scored a victory.

Oh yeah, turn on that TV. Glee? Still bringing in viewers, and not all of them are gay. That’s our show, folks. Modern Family? That’s our show. Ellen is coming out saying that her marriage to Portia di Rossi was one of the best things that she’s ever done. That’s one of our very own enjoying nationwide media coverage. It’s something that we need to focus on.

There’s plenty of things to be excited about. If you’re feeling glum about being gay, guess what? It’s time to realize your worth as a person.

You need to march up to that mirror, look at it and really decide what type of person you’re going to be. You have to choose to be happy, even when the chips are stacked against you.

Yes, there are going to be people that think you’re the devil because you love people from your own gender. SO be it. Yes, I said it — so be it. Look, you can’t 100% approval. Even if all 50 states make gay marriage legal someday, the reality is that people will still have negative opinions. You can’t control them, but you can always control you.

That’s not something that’s going to necessarily get us supportive mail, but try to see what we’re really trying to tell you. It gets better. You have to believe that — or the game’s lost. Don’t let their words make you lose the game. Your life matters. If you have to take back your life by realizing that you’re worth more than you can ever imagine, then you definitely need to take that road. There’s a vibrant life ahead of you, why not claim it?


  1. Judith O'Day says:

    Megan O’Day turned 18 on April 18, 2013. On May 12, 2013 she walked in front of a train. She was sensitive and emotional and under the care of a therapist. She had a girlfriend whose mother had recently found out that they had a relationship. This woman knew Megan was suicidal- she knew Megan had a therapist; her daughter had one also. When her daughter was admitted for care- my daughter was the friend who stood by her. Their friendship blossomed into love that made them both stronger. I don’t know if this was a phase; experimenting or how she was meant to be. I do know that the mother yanked her daughter away and stopped allowing her to have private therapy. She sat in and her daughter was unable to be honest. Lies became the only way to live. Her daughter was not to see mine. Her daughter was forced to pretend that she believed a hateful God did not want her to have love and comfort. My daughter talked her through the day that she had her uncle’s gun in her hands. My daughter loved her and she loved my smart beautiful daughter who would have graduated on May 24, 2013. The mom was going back to California and taking her daughter on the 25th. BUT that wasn’t enough. She followed her daughter even when she went to the park- to prevent any kind of meet up. She told the school to keep them apart. But the end came when she stood over her daughter’s shoulder and dictated hate. She had the girl write cruel spewing unending lies of hate that was not inspired by God or love. She was unrelenting. She could have just told her daughter to say nothing. Instead she said “Make her believe there is nothing and never was. They could have stopped, but they didn’t. My daughter ended her life. She was cyber incited to suicide. This is not free speech. This is beyond cyber bullying. This is lethal advocacy that was a biased hate crime. The police say there is nothing to prosecute. They didn’t even receive a ticket for cyber bullying. Why? Is it because of their relationship- are they biased also? Did the mother expect her fragile daughter to take the full on blame for pushing my baby in front of the train? I don’t understand how this wrongful death is okay. Is this something that needs to become a civil suit? I know Idaho is not an equal rights or even human rights state, but there are Federal laws against screaming fire in a theater, there are laws against bullying. I need to understand why I feel that this is being swept under the rug as though it is okay. Help me understand.

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