Youth Guide

Leadership & wellness for all youth

Do You Need Formal Gay Marriage In Your Life

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One of the most contentious issues in society is the subject of gay marriage. When you’re just coming out, you might wonder about gay marriage yourself. Even if you’re far away from the topic of marriage you still want to make sure that it’s something that you can actually do.

Not every state offers gay marriage of domestic partnership. Keep in mind that these definitions and terms are representations of legal representation — not life representation.

In other words, if you meet someone that you truly do want to spend the rest of your life with, don’t just discount them because the state that you live in doesn’t recognize gay marriage. There is so much more to life than a piece of paper, or even the “acknowledgement” that comes from being able to say that the other person is your legal spouse. There are straight people getting married that don’t necessarily have a good union, either.


The truth is that humans will always want to do the things that truly make them feel connected. If you want to get married, you can indeed go to Canada or another state that handles gay marriage. If it’s important to have the recognition from another authority, then you definitely should explore this. However, you will need to ensure that you think about the life side of things as well.

Getting someone that cares about you is the much harder road to climb. It takes work to be a gay couple, especially if you don’t live in a community that’s especially supportive. Both of you will have to look at each other and really decide if this is what you both want to do.

And if it’s not, that’s not a comment about gay relationships. It’s just a reality — two people that didn’t work out together. A lot of newly “out” gay teens get into relationships and think that they have to be with their “one true love” right away and they’re a failure if they don’t do that. This is just not true at all. If you want happiness, you have to do what makes you happy in the moment. We’re never guaranteed anything like happiness.

It’s all about what we really fight for, what we really desire, and what we’re really willing to do to get what we want.

The subject of gay marriage will forever have its share of supporters as well as detractors — even within the GLBT community. You just need to figure out how to be happy through all seasons and everything else will really fall into place. Get out there and experience the best that life has to offer today!

Do You Need To Tell a Landlord that You’re Gay

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Your first apartment is a pretty exciting milestone in your life. There’s just no other way to say it. Having an apartment means that you’re on your way to some big and bright things, and that’s nothing to sneeze at! However, if you’ve come out proudly as a member of the gay community, you might wonder if you have to tell anyone — like your landlord.

Talking to the person that can legally evict you from their property is a pretty scary thought, especially when you’re young. Here’s a few things that you will want to definitely keep in mind.


Just because you don’t physically own the home doesn’t mean that you don’t have rights. If you’re at all worried about renting opportunities in your area, you will need to look up the tenancy laws for your state. That covers what the landlord can and cannot do. They cannot just evict you because you are openly gay. They can however evict you if you damage the property or do not pay your rent or even have someone living there who is not on the lease as a tenant or an occupant. That’s something that you might forget about, but we can promise you that your landlord will not just forget about it. So you have to make sure that you have your wits about you at every turn.

If you do have a conflict with your landlord, make sure that you keep a log of what happened, the date that it occurred, and also what actions you took to try to resolve the problem. Everything involving your landlord should be in written form as well as just a phone conversation. You need to do this because if you don’t you’ll have problems getting your natural rights as a tenant.

If you are looking at a new apartment, you can have a conversation with the landlord. Let them know that you are a good and clean person who just wants somewhere to live. Money talks more than anything else — if you’re someone that pays their bills, then what you do in your personal life is up to you. There’s no legal requirement to inform your landlord of your life as a gay person. Even if you have guests over to spend the night occasionally, that doesn’t mean that they are now occupants. You have to read your lease and make sure that you know exactly what your fights really are.

Are you ready to look for an apartment right now? The internet is really your best connection unless you live in a very small town. Then you will need to look at the newspaper. Either way, we wish you the best of luck!